I admit to being old enough to remember when phones were used for making phone calls – and nothing else. But I am actually quite happy with the many uses of the modern cell phone. Like many of you, my life is contained in my cell phone. I have my contacts, my e-mail, my texts, even my banking and traveling are available through my phone. It seems a misnomer to call it a phone. Since I’m being honest, I will admit to playing some games on my phone with my wife and friends. I worry sometimes that I spend too much time on the phone.

I believe that I do not live in my phone the way the younger generation does. The amount of time that young people spend on their phone is, frankly, harmful, because of their immaturity. We don’t let twelve year olds drive or drink alcohol, but somehow most parents do not realize how destructively phone use is affecting their children’s emotional and social development. The children are cheating themselves when they use artificial intelligence to do their work for them, and often it’s too easy to let the phone answer questions in school if they are allowed to have a phone in the classroom. They would rather text with poor spelling, emojis, and slang than actually talk face to face. They are missing the opportunity to experience the world when they have their faces in their phones at all times. So what can we do?

The first thing I recommend is to make sure parents know what is on their children’s phones. Parents must set limits on the types of apps and links. The software is available. From pornography to violent sites, there is much for parents to be concerned about. I have also been told of an organization named Affinity Esports, (https://www.affinityesports.gg/). Please check out what they do to help tackle the problem of gaming addiction.

I believe you should insist that your school keep control of student cell phones during the school day. At home, you should also have control of your children’s phones, especially while doing homework and at night when they are supposed to be asleep. Let’s start by asserting our control as parents. And, by the way, parents should be good role models: no phones at the dinner table. Have conversations. Insist on getting honest descriptions of the day’s activities.

The modern cell phone is an extraordinary device. It can be a wonderful tool or a very dangerous one. It is your choice.

Robert B. Golenbock, MD, is currently retired. He has cared for children in the Danbury area for 43 years, including at the Center for Pediatric Medicine. The CPM is located at 107 Newtown Rd, #1D, Danbury, CT, 06810. For more information, please call (203) 790-0822 or visit their website at https://centerforpediatricmedct.com.